There’s nothing better
than seeing either my friends or one of my family
members committing their lives to the person that
makes them the happiest.
I love being able to share in the joy and beauty of the
However, there’s always one thing that inevitably
ruins the fun at weddings for me. And that is the
well-meaning, but unwelcome attention from those
people who can’t help but comment on the fact that
But, believe it or not, and I say this on behalf of most
singletons I know, your concern is misplaced.
Yes, it’s nice to have a partner, but we’re certainly not
defined by them (or lack thereof), and judging us on
the fact that we don’t have someone by our side,
especially at a wedding, isn’t fair.
To give you a bit of a guide on how to interact with
single people at a wedding, here’s a list of things you
shouldn’t say or ask us:
1. So, have you been dating anyone?
Frankly, as far as conversation starters go, we’d much
rather talk about the weather. I suppose I could be
nice enough to let it slide the first time around, but if
you do this at every single wedding I see you at
afterwards, consider yourself uninvited to my future
2. When will you get a boyfriend?
When pigs fly? When the moon turns purple? Oh, the
snarky comebacks one could come up with in response
to this question.
But, I’ll let you in on a little secret. I’ll get a boyfriend
when I want one.
Trust me, I’ve made the mistake of dating for the sake
of dating and to not be lonely, and I’ve learned that
it’s better to be on your own than to be with someone
who feels more like a platonic friend than anything
3. When are you and your partner planning to get
married? (This one’s for the singles who are dating)
Oh it depends.
If I’m at a funeral can I ask when it’s your turn to
die? (Oh, and for the record, don’t follow those
questions up with when will you have children, when
will you have a second child, etc)
No one likes being asked this. No one.
4. The bride is about to throw her bouquet. You
should totally go and join in on the fun.
Not all single people are comfortable with the idea of
going to the middle of the reception hall. If you want
to, then by all means do (and good for you), but don’t
try to force me to join in.
I happen to be an introvert and hate feeling as if I’m
5. Oooh, I know someone you should totally meet.
Um, no. I didn’t come to the wedding to find someone
to date. And no, I don’t need you to play matchmaker
for me. If someone wants to get to know me, I’d
rather that it happen naturally and unexpectedly,
instead of having someone trying to set me up with
I know that it works for people in some cases, and I’m
always thrilled when it does happen, but I’m not up
for it, and would appreciate it if you’d not try to
decide how I should meet my potential soul mate.
Has someone ever said one of the abovementioned
things to you? What else would you add to the list
There’s nothing better